How often do we read the Bible and think to ourselves, "What are these people thinking, don't they know better by now!?" True while there are some particularly stubborn people in the Bible, most of the time we are no better than the people who frustrate us the most in the Bible. Excuse me, I can only speak for myself here, I am no better than the people who frustrate me the most in the Bible. No one gets me so frustrated as the Israelites of old. You know the ones who wondered the desert for forty years. They experienced some of the greatest miracles of any generation in the history of man yet they were so quick to forget about who God really was and what He was capable of.
I was reminded of this when I was reading Psalm chapter 78. If you have never read it I recommend you do. It is a great summation of the entire book of Exodus. In this chapter there was one sentence that stuck out like a sore thumb to me. It reads, "For they did not believe God or trust him to care for them." Psalm 78:22. Recently, I have undergone some financial hardship. My wife runs an in home daycare and at the moment is only watching one child. We have tried to find other children for her to care for but just when it seems like something is going to work out, it doesn't. On top of this we just had to fork out $400 to repair our car plus there is a pending cost for the ticket that my wife was given during the car accident. My truck has stopped working properly and it is also in the shop. In the next couple of months all my school loans will be out of the grace period and that will cost us a couple hundred dollars a month. We want to be a family that has enough surplus to give plentifully to others, but honestly we are barely scraping by.
All this at once caused me to go in a panic nearly and sent my frustration over the top that I have not yet been able to land the job that I feel I am ready for. I have worked my tail off for the past couple of years to become a school administrator. But getting to the point, it bothers me immensely that my first reaction to all this struggle is to take matters into my own hand and push God out of the equation. The truth is if I were to lay my life out on a time line I would have moments one after another of how God has provided for all my needs plus more. There are several things about our human nature that combat our service to God but none greater, in my opinion, than that of our memory. Our memory can remind us of who God is but it can also fail us when we need it most. We forget how reliable God is and how much He really loves us. Our memory can be crystal clear when times are good but murky and inaccurate when we are pressed. The Israelites are prime examples of this.
I pray that my memory will serve to keep me close to God even in the most trying times. Part of the function of this blog is to record God's doing and revelations so that I will always be reminded. However, this is not enough. This is a matter of prayer. I need to pray for a godly memory and constantly remind myself of who God is and what He has done in prayer so that I will never forget that my God truly is an awesome God! Lord, I believe in you and trust you to take care of me.
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